2013-11-10 - Mission: Intergang: I Will Break
Sawyer Mason was knocked out cold, and by the time she arrived at the Avengers Mansion, there were mild pain killers and a sedative introduced to her to keep her out. From there, the machine was finished being prepped, brain scans were done, and the next time Sawyer woke it was do migraines and pain as the reverse brainwashing therapy began. Thankfully, it didn't take too long, but fifteen minutes of hell before another sedative was introduced and oblivion came. But there are dreams...dreams not as easily shaken as reality. Perhaps 'memories' of what was done, or snatches of the end event, who knows really what Swayer dreams, but she does as the brain waves register. It's six hours later after the treatment, and Sawyer is still strapped down to the medical bed for safety reasons. Stark sits in a comfy chair that was dragged down from upstairs and is staring seemingly blindly at her. The Holo-PDA forgotten in his lap, dangling loosely from between his fingers that holds in somewhat in place so it doesn't slide off as he leans back into the chair. He has two days growth of beard on him, the 5 o'clock shadow a bit beyond where it should be clean shaven and, due for a bit of a trim elsewhere. There are pockets under his eyes again, though not as dark as they were previously. Hell.. is that what hell is like? Sawyer certainly feels like she's been through hell and back. She slowly tries to open her eyes and check out the world around her.. the world of dreams not in the least what she wants to linger in. Eyes, half-lidded, she looks up at the ceiling. She doesn't look around yet.. just staring at the ceiling for several minutes, before making the attempt to open her eyes more fully. Then she tries to move, and finds she can't. She struggles a little, but really doesn't have the energy to move.. she's too rung out. Stark notices when the readings change and he slowly, nervously gets up quietly. He carefully sets his Holo-Pad aside and softly asks, "Sawyer?" There is concern and worry in his tone, and...unsureness. She thought she was by herself, so to hear the voice, it makes her jump. Well, she would jump if she could. Her head turns, snapping to the side, and she immediately regrets it.. closing her eyes and groaning. If she could lift her hand to her head, she would.. and she attempts, having momentarily forgotten she's strapped down. Then it dawns on her, she registers that she saw Tony's face, and she groans again, turning her head the opposite directions, despite the discomfort. Stark actually sighs and raises a hand to run through his hair, already a chaotic mess. "I...have some pain killers. Cap had a hell of a headache once the brainwashing reversal was completed too. I got pills and injections, I suggest the injections if you want fasting relief," he advises. He struggles to keep a chipper tone. "Oh, I got all the paperwork ready for signing for you to come back from the dead. Congratulations by the way. Not everyone gets to do that. When I originally made the request for the forms, people thought I was mad. Funny that really." He's running at the mouth, betraying how nervous he is. Tears begin to form in her eyes, a few breaking free to trickle down over her cheeks. "How can you even look at me?" Is that the only thing she can think of? Not the whole.. 'Hey, you were dead and now you're alive'. Not even the offer of pain relief. Maybe she feels she doesn't deserve it. Stark's throat closes a bit, "How can I not? How can you even forgive me...this is...all my fault. You losing.../everything/, being defiled and abused by Viper." This words come out uneven, betraying the emotion he feels. "I'm sorry. I know...that it can't make up for everything that...happened to you. But, I'll make this as smooth a process as I can." Sawyer can feel Stark closing in as he presses a button to release the restraints on her wrists and ankles. "I have arranged for Aunt Mellie to be brought back from 'vacation', so you can see her. She should be home in another hour or so." More tears begin to flow, streams down her cheeks. She shakes her head, as best as she can, and as soon as she feels the restraints free her, she slowly rolls to her side, facing away from you. "There's nothing to forgive you for." She chokes out, her tears evident in her voice. "I didn't listen to you.. if I'd just listened.. if only I.. it's all my fault. I don't know what I was thinking.. you were right.. you are more than capable of taking care of yourself.. I shouldn't have.. I didn't think.. and.. and.. I did the one thing.. I promised you I'd never do.." "Oh yes, because it was totally /you/ that revealed my secret identity to Viper, and totally /you/ that ordered the hit on me and got caught in-between instead, and totally /you/ that asked to be brainwashed. Congrats, you are more powerful and influential than I ever suspected Sawyer," the sarcasm beyond obvious. "I suggest you drop the stupid before you see Aunt Mellie, cause her lectures cut really damn deep." He then moves to gently, but firmly help Sawyer set up. "Hold out your right arm," he advises, and she will see he has a needle prepped. "Pain killer," he advises, referencing the earlier conversation that Sawyer decided to ignore. If her head didn't hurt right now, she'd probably tell you exactly what she thinks about /that/. Instead, she starts.. "No.. I didn't.. and I didn't.. but I /did/ step in front of you.." And then you're helping her up and the room starts spinning. She wraps her arms around you, her breathing a little shorter as she tries to get the spinning to stop. "Bloody hell." She curses, her nails digging in as her brain hammers against her skull. She whimpers softly, hugging a little tighter, and holding a little longer than necessary, before finally loosening and 'disentangling' to be able to hold out her arm. She still doesn't meet your gaze. "Even after your lecture.. /not/ to try and help.. knowing you were just trying to keep me safe.. and I didn't listen. I stepped in between you.. and danger.. instead of dropping.. ducking.. like you told me to.. but I didn't listen.. if I had.. then I wouldnt have been taken.. so stop trying to make me feel better." She manages to growl at you. "And after I promised never to hurt you.. the way your past girlfriends did.. what do I do? Try to kill you.. at least twice!" "Forget it," Stark says. "Even if you did, you were still placed in danger from the very beginning because of my enemies. Viper knew my secret identity," he states bluntly. "Oh, don't worry about it, honestly, it's nothing new, doesn't even really bug me very much at all," he says off-handedly. But he is then injecting the pain killer into Sawyer's arm. "You will have scheduled appointments you cannot skip or dodge with Doc Samson to assist with the recovering from the brain washing effects and the lovely emotional trauma I got to put you through. Enjoy, I hear he's quite pleasant and talented." The needle is then dropped into a secured disposal unit. If she could find something to throw at you, she would. "Damn you." She curses. "You knew I signed on, knowing the danger.. well, maybe not at the time that you were Iron Man.. but blast it all.." The needle makes her flinch. ".. God.." She shakes her head, thankful that even though it still hurts a bit, it doesn't feel quite as bad. "You just can't stand to let me blame myself.. and not take the weight all on your shoulders, can you?" She moves to slide from her 'bed', and as her feet hit the floor.. so will she. Having been abed for two days, her legs weren't quite ready to hold her up. "Well, when you see stupid, you call stupid. Everyone else does it to me, so why should you be spared?" Stark's words are certainly blunt enough, but apparently they got the point across. "Take it easy, you just had brain washing reversed. I kept you out for a number of hours afterwards for a reason. Don't tell Cap this, but he threw up afterwards. Lesson learned. Oops me." But Stark is moving to get a robe down from a hanger, lesson learned from the Pepper incident as he goes to warp Sawyer up in it so she doesn't have to worry about exposing herself in the medical gown. "Need help walking to the bathroom?" Note, walking to the bathroom, not inside it. Sawyer glares over at you. "Then take your own advice.. and stop being stupid yourself." She throws it right back at you, and leans back against the bed briefly after you help her on with the robe. Her legs are pretty shaky, and she takes several deep breaths. "I can't see Aunt Mellie yet.. even when she gets back.. I don't think I'm ready for that yet." She glances sideways at you, then quickly away. "You're never going to trust me again.. you're going to push me away after you make sure I'm fine." She sounds like she already knows the answer. "I guess it's no more than I deserve." She shakes her head. "I'll make it. Don't want to burden you further." After all this.. everything.. all she ever did was because she loves you. "You'll even say it's better that way.. I know.. I remember.. you've said it before.. and this.. just seals it, doesn't it?" She pushes away from the bed.. away from you. Pride's a bitch... and doesn't go unpaid. She takes a few steps, and drops. A snort at Stark, "It's take the responsibility or shove it on someone that is innocent. I'll take responsibility for this one," he states. He won't dump it on Cap. "You are going to go see Aunt Mellie," Stark states matter-of-factly. "You been through hell, I'm not lessening that, but so has Aunt Mellie. You know, she still visits your grave site regularly and puts flowers on it? Or the fact when your name is mentioned, she struggles not to cry? She still thinks you are /dead/ Sawyer. And oh ya, hopefully she went on vacation before she saw the fact I dug up your grave site to test the ashes. She be pissed at me otherwise." He works to help you to the bathroom, carrying you if he has to so this conversation can detour. He sets you down just outside the bathroom door, before he opens it. "Go take a piss, I'm sure you are ready to burst." Talk about dodging the issue at hand. It's carry her, or she doesn't get there.. but you've got a fight on your hands. Well, as much of one as she can muster. "Okay.. she thought I was dead.. she can wait a little longer." She gets a little snarky. "Besides.. I have those.. 'Dr. visits'. you say I /have/ to be at." She even goes so far as to hit, punch and scratch.. but they're weak, and you win out in the end. She still doesn't make it easy on you. "Damn it.. why?" Her voice sounds a little choked. "Is this my punishment?" She pushes away from you, slamming the bathroom door after stumbling inside. Thankfully, there's a sink, and other things to hold on to. She takes awhile.. but then fiddling with the robe, trying to make sure not to pee on it.. then wiping and washing afterwards.. it's more of a challenge when her body doesn't want to work the way she wants it to. When she finally emerges, she expects you to be gone. "I'll let Aunt Mellie know you are alive and do not wish to see her then. Let's see how that goes. Because she has been patient enough with being shipped about by SHIELD in witness protection and she doesn't even know why, and I've already heard that SHIELD agents are calling her the 'hell job'." The little fit doesn't do much to him, but then Sawyer is in the bathroom and Stark steps to the side to wait for her to come back out. Stark is still there waiting. He pushes off from the wall and moves to sweep you up with ease again. He's actually stronger than when Sawyer was eighteen, there aren't even a single grunt from him. He moves to set you back on the medical bed, but leaves you sitting up. "Look, it isn't about punishment. It's about you getting better and not being alone over something that isn't your fault. It's about making sure you don't punish yourself, cause I /know/ you. I know you are going to try to take responsibility for things that isn't your fault because you were brain washed, going to try and isolate yourself as punishment, and generally curse your existence and I don't want you to start doing something insanely stupid like suicidal thoughts. It's /my/ job to be a fuck up, not yours. So I'm going to look after you, because love like that doesn't just die Sawyer. I never forgot you, I never just 'moved' on. I'm more cemented in my belief you are definitely better without me as my secret identity is about to get blown to hell and back again publicly now for a number of reasons, but I'm not going to just abandon you, alright?" Sawyer blinks when she sees you still there when she opens the door. A brief look of relief crosses her features, before she covers it quickly with a scowl. "You don't have to be such a git.. just tell her I'm recovering, and am seeing a Dr. to get my head straight." And then you're sweeping her off her feet. "What the.. Tony!" She chides, though there's no real bite to her tone. She refrains from slapping you, though part of her tells her she should push you away with every fiber of her being.. and suffer the heart ache now when she's already feeling like crap and has the Dr.'s visits to get her back from it... but then there's that part of her that loves you more than is good for her. She shakes her head. "Don't you dare let me off the hook completely. You're right.. I've been a stupid git.. thinking I could really make you happy.. and not end up causing you misery.. and more self loathing.. but I'm the reason for this latest bit of blame you're heaping on yourself.. so don't deprive me of my own share of it." It would be so much better if she just looked away, tried not to enjoy the feel of your arms holding her.. but a whole year without you.. fighting to save you - even if it was only just implanted in her brain by HYDRA - she relaxes against your chest, wrapping her arms around your neck and laying her head on your shoulder. "But then you will.. when I'm back on my feet, right?" She asks, the ache of her heart plain in her voice. "I won't be suicidal.. I couldn't do that to Aunt Mellie.." Her voice drops to barely above a whisper. ".. or you." Then it sinks in about your secret, and her head snaps up. At least the pain meds have kicked in, and her head isn't throbbing from the action. "Your secret's out?" She shakes her head. "Not that you're Iron Man?!" Okay.. panic sets in, and she can feel her heart pounding against her chest, her eyes widening as her breath comes shorter. "Oh, I'm sure you will have plenty. Self-destructive likely being the top one. Come to think of it, you always kind of were," Stark says thoughtfully, forcing himself to keep a more chipper attitude about all of this for Sawyer. "Have you even met Aunt Mellie's foster child? She loves dolls, she named one Sawyer from what I hear." Topic change! "Oh, not your fault, Hawkeye blurted out my name in front of a bunch of Fire Fighters, and some SHIELD agents. Lovely, right? I almost threatened to missile him, but he ran for it before my suit fully rebooted. Ass. Anyway, it's just in rag magazines right now, but not likely to stay there." Stark then shrugs, "We will deal with the future when it gets here. Right now, we got to get the past and current straightened out." He then moves to pick up a folder nearby along with a pen. He walks over and sets it in your lap. "Sign on all of the yellow highlighted areas please," Stark advises. "This is you legally coming back from the dead. The former owner of the bookstore has been managing it since your 'untimely demise', but I am sure she would be delighted with your return." Sawyer is quick to shake her head. "But your secret!" She bites her lower lip. "You were already in the lime light, because of who you are.. /The/ Tony Stark.. and now.. the world will know you're Iron Man!" She just about slides from the bed, wanting to come over to you.. but then you're there with the folder and papers for her to sign. She frowns slightly, looking down at the pages, taking the pen. She quickly signs the highlighted portions, not really paying attention to what she's signing.. more looking at you. The bookstore is not at the forefront of her mind at the moment. She hands the papers and pen back to you, sliding to her feet.. smart enough to keep her weight balanced against the bed. "But Tony.. I don't care about the bookstore right now.." Of course she cares about the bookstore.. she just cares about you more. "Well, you should. If I remember right, the former owner had wanted to retire, but Aunt Mellie didn't know what to do with the business and didn't have the heart to sell it, so the former owner became the manager. And the secret identity thing isn't something you can control Sawyer, shit happens. I'm thinking of just going out with one hell of a bang, you know? Just say: 'Fuck It'. Seems my style anyway," Stark says almost flippantly. "Either that or murder Hawkeye. Could do both, no one has to know the truth about Hawkeye's demise." Sawyer wrinkles her nose, reaching out for you. If you pull back, she tries to follow you, and likely stumbles if you wouldn't catch her. "You wouldn't.." She says, firm in the belief that you wouldn't do something like that to a teammate. "It wouldn't stop it from getting out, and would weigh on your conscious. Then again, you seem to like bearing the weight of the world." "Sawyer, shit, I wouldn't really kill my teammate, only threaten to." Stark does catch Sawyer's arms, and moves to set her back on the table, before moving to pick up the spilled paperwork from the floor. "Just sit and rest, alright?" He sighs. "I got to go turn these things in, I'll have Jarvis come down with some food for you. If I'm not back in a timely manner, I'll have one of the Avengers come up you upstairs to an actual bed, hopefully Black Widow or Spider-Woman so they can help you clean up if you want. By then, Aunt Mellie should be back home, and if I don't tell her we have you back and let her see you, she really would murder me." Sawyer's cheeks flush lightly when you have to catch her. "Sorry.." She shakes her head, unable to help the smile when you set her back up on the bed. "What would you call a timely manner?" She watches you pick up the papers, but then she looks away again, tears springing to her eyes. She turns away, laying back down and rolling with her back to face you. "Okay.." Then you mention Aunt Mellie. "Just please tell her.. I don't know.. just tell her my mind's real messed up... and she can see me.. but I need time... and it's best if I not see her just yet.. please? I think I'd crumble if she comes in here.. and falls into that overly mothering.. protective bit that I know she will.. I'll just fall apart." She curls her legs, tucking her hand under her head. "I feel like I'm barely holding it together as it is." "Ya, you really think that work?" Stark snorts. "And crumble then for gods sake," which the term usage of 'gods' beyond rare for Stark, likely the first Sawyer has ever heard it. He gets the paperwork picked up and stuffed back into the folder. It isn't orderly like before, but who cares. "Look, scream, cry, throw a fit, whatever. Let it out. Perhaps Aunt Mellie can help with that. But locking yourself away and being alone isn't going to work, believe me, been there, done that," he advises. "It sucks." Sawyer shakes her head. "No.. no.. if you don't.. I'll refuse to see her. Just be kinder, and tell her I need a little time.. it's for my benefit. If she thinks it's to help me.. she'll understand. She won't like it.. but she'll do it." She's choking up a bit. "Please.. I just can't do it right now. I can't deal with Aunt Mellie.. and if you really care about me.. you'll understand." Yes, she played that card. "Sawyer," Stark's tone hardens. "Then you sure as hell shouldn't be seeing me. I'll be leaving now with the paperwork. I'll have Jarvis and one of the other Avengers assist." He then starts walking out. Sawyer cringes, tucking herself a little more into a ball. "Don't bother.." Yes, that hurt.. hurt like hell.. but then again.. she thinks she deserves it. She doesn't even turn to look as you walk out, tears breaking free to stream down her cheeks.. but she manages to keep from sniffling.. she bites her lip to stay silent. It's what you would do eventually, and she just needs to harden herself now.